Re: [問卦] 哈利波特給昆汀塔倫堤諾拍會怎樣?消失

看板Gossiping作者BlueTuna601時間7年前 (2017/02/25 00:26)推噓29(29推 0噓 3→)

留言32則, 30人參與討論串2/2 (看更多)

※ 引述《NSYSUKING (台服布里茨最後希望)》之銘言： : 安安 : 昆汀塔倫堤諾 : 擅長使用暴力血腥畫面的知名導演 : 著名的作品有追殺比爾黑色追緝令惡棍特工決殺令八惡人 : 如果哈利波特給昆汀塔倫堤諾拍會怎樣啊? : 乾五八卦 (Chapter One - God Damn Boy) 開頭是黑白電影聚焦在樹林中的一棟小屋數道白光黑影交雜接著一段淒厲尖叫陷入一片黑暗 (配著輕鬆的美式音樂) 腳步聲慢慢逼近搭著口哨聲「Damn! What the hell is going on here?」開口的是鄧不利多(山謬傑克森飾) 此時定格人物身旁出現 Albus Dumbledore 的字樣「He...he killed lily and James Potter...but...」海格帶著哭腔回答，向鄧不利多遞出手中之物 - 一個嬰兒定格出現 Rubeus Hagrid 的字樣「Huh...So that why you woke me up at 2:00AM...」鄧不利多低頭，掀起包住嬰兒的布巾瞧了瞧「Okay Okay~ You can take it away~ Put it into the woods or somewhere...」鄧不利多說完，蓋上布巾轉身就走「What? He's just a baby! Dumbledore!」海格聽完大驚，連忙質問鄧不利多鄧不利多停止走動，將右手微舉「Did I look like a blind, Mr.Hagrid?」「No sir! I mean...」海格急忙想解釋，卻被鄧不利多用食指抵住嘴巴「Nah Nah Nah...Who am I...Mr.Hagrid...Who am I?」鄧不利多雙眼看著海格微笑，用手指捲起海格的大鬍子鏡頭開始360度緩緩旋轉環繞拍攝兩人全身此時配樂變得越來越小聲「......」海格不敢說話，鏡頭拉近在海格額上豆大的汗珠「I say WHO THE FUCK AM I!? YOU MOTHERFXXKER!!!」鄧不利多瞪大雙眼，破口大罵「You are Dumbledore! Albus Dumbledore,the greatest wizard in the world!」海格開始飆汗，眼眶滲出淚滴，緊緊抱著手中的嬰兒「Yes! I'm FXXKING Albus Dumbledore...the FXXKING greatest wizard in the FXXKING world...and now you take me as a GOD DAMN nanny...HUH?」鄧不利多一手指著海格，一手指著自己「No sir...I...I didn't...」海格彎下腰，巨人的身軀變得比鄧不利多還低「And where are we...Hagrid...where are we?」鄧不利多繼續質問，兩手扯著海格的鬍子「Hogwarts...Hogwarts...」海格開始語無倫次，雙手越抱越緊「Yes! Here is FXXKING Hogwarts! My school! Not a FXXKING nursery! I won't let this little punk stay in my FXXKING school! Do you understand? YOU BIG FAT MOTHERFXXKER! Do you FXXKING UNDERSTAND?」鄧不利多放開海格的鬍子，海格重心不穩向後倒地「I will take him away! I will take him away!」海格放聲大哭，鏡頭由上往下拍攝「Good! Good! That's my boy! HAHAHA!」鄧不利多整理了整理斗篷露出潔白牙齒的微笑鄧不利多準備扶起海格下一秒卻皺起了眉頭「Mr.Hagrid...」「Any problem...Mr.Dumbledore?」海格一臉疑惑「I think you hold it too tight...」鄧不利多一手指著海格懷中，另一手掀起布巾「Holy Shit! You killed him, Mr.Hagrid! You son of the bitch...」鄧不利多露出厭惡的表情莞爾一笑，海格則是一臉茫然 (進入黑畫面，開始播放哈利波特主題曲混著西部風格曲調) 先彈出黃字 A Flim by Quentin Tarantino 黃字消失跳出浮誇斗大紅字 Harry Potter 再來跳出第二章標題 (Chapter Two - The Man without His Nose) 一共會有五章，片長將近3個小時這樣 -- ※ 發信站: 批踢踢實業坊(ptt.cc), 來自: 61.230.177.180 ※ 文章網址: https://www.ptt.cc/bbs/Gossiping/M.1487953565.A.332.html

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kuninaka

02/25 00:27, , 1^F

02/25 00:27, 1^F

不是每部昆汀電影，第一章就都會出現裸足好ㄇ

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zyxwv0417

02/25 00:30, , 2^F

02/25 00:30, 2^F

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balahaha

02/25 00:30, , 3^F