[外電] 教皇：干我「鳥」事
Jazz Notebook: The only tweet Sloan knows is ref's whistle
教皇：干我「鳥」事
註：原標題既機車又好笑，可惜翻不出來啊 XD
By Tim Buckley
Deseret News
When Jerry Sloan was asked about Milwaukee's Charlie Villanueva getting
scolded by coach Scott Skiles for sending a tweet on Twitter during halftime
of the Bucks' game against Boston last Sunday, the 66-year-old Jazz coach
first had to be told what it was before realizing what had been done wrong.
記者拿比克上班偷打tweet被教練抓包的事問教皇意見，
不過這個66歲的老灰仔壓根不曉得他說的是什麼鬼？！
Twitter is a free, social online messaging network in which short notes are
posted in real time, and this reportedly was Villanueva's from Sunday: "In da
locker room, snuck to post my twitt. We're playing the Celtics, tie ball game
at da half. Coach wants more toughness. I gotta step up."
事件發生在上禮拜天公鹿對超賽比賽的中場休息時間，
不專心聽講的比克偷偷摸摸地傳了一則tweet到Twitter網站上：
「哇低休息素啦，掏掏啊貢，吸吸，穩咖超賽啪尬擠半，陪咻喔，」
「嗯咕告練公愛穩歌嘎硬捏啦，哇跨哇懶啪雞蝦丟愛掐齁昂啦...」
還來不及捏緊●●的比克隨後被震怒的史凱爾斯教練罵了個狗血淋頭。
"I don't follow that," Sloan said. "I don't even have a computer. I don't
know how to turn one on. I don't know what you're talking about. I'm going to
be totally honest. How would you do that?"
「你說那什麼偶不豬道啦！」教皇回答，
「偶家又沒電腦，偶連怎麼開機都不會了...怎麼可能會豬道？」
「說真格的，你要不要說說看那個什麼tweet是要按哪個鍵啊？」
Told it could be done with a mobile phone, Sloan — raised in a tiny, remote
Illinois town — was further perplexed.
當被告知用手機就可以發送tweet之後，
這個伊利諾小鎮長大的農夫只有益發滿頭霧水。
"I have a phone," he said, "but I don't know how to use it that way. . . .
See, I grew up without a telephone until I was a junior in high school. And
I've always been intimidated by that stuff."
「電話偶素有啦，可素除了接打電話偶不知道還能拿它來幹啥...」
「反正偶高中之前從沒看過這玩意兒日子不也是這樣過過來了？！」
「而且老實縮偶看到這種高科技的東西還會怕怕的捏！」
When Jazz point guard Deron Williams joined the conversation, he had to be
enlightened as well — or at least acted as if he did. Teammates Ronnie
Brewer and Carlos Boozer also claimed to have little or no knowledge of
Twitter, whose big fans include veteran NBA center Shaquille O'Neal.
蝶龍跟著加入對話，不過顯然他也(裝)不知道這是啥咪毀，
另外兩位村夫小酒跟不惹也異口同聲說不知道、不清楚tweet的作用。
你嘛幫幫忙，Twitter可是連俠客這種老摳摳都愛用的網站服務耶！
But they're all much more technologically advanced than Sloan.
不過比起教皇，這幾個年輕人的科技程度已經算好很多的了...
"Coach doesn't like it when we text," 24-year-old Williams said.
「老頭子不喜歡看到我們打簡訊啦...」小蝶龍怯聲道。
Sloan has a loosely enforced no-cell-phone rule on the team bus, and earlier
this season had to deal with one players' actually ringing in a locker during
a team meeting.
教皇對於球員在巴士上打手機並沒有嚴格的限制，
他還提到季初有個球員在他訓話時手機大響的往事。
"Years ago, I would have put my foot on it and squeezed on it," the Jazz
coach said. "But I'm too old to do that (now). I'm afraid I'll slip off of it
and hurt myself.
「要素再早個幾年，林杯肯定會把手機搶過來踩個稀巴爛，」
「但素偶現在太老啦，偶還怕偶踩一踩會跌倒咧～」
"All that stuff is fine," he added.
"That's the modern time, and I just haven't progressed in that area."
「年輕人愛怎麼玩無妨啦，時代謀港款啊啦，」教皇繼續說道，
「穩咕林杯丟係謀愛鵝接五ㄟ謀ㄟ，不爽你嘎哇咬啊！」
tweet: (名) 小鳥的啁啾聲、吱吱聲
Twitter: 熱門網站服務，參考說明 http://briian.com/?p=5325
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