[心得] 喜歡引用吉卜齡的賊-The Burglar Who Liked to Quote Kiplin
喜歡引用吉卜齡的賊—The Burglar Who Liked to Quote Kipling (1979)
事件起源—
有個名叫Whelkin的人主動接洽我們的主人公，要他去某戶人家偷一本Kipling的書，而且這
次有個特殊的要求—得在屋主在家的時候行竊。一開始，事情貌似進行得很順利，但想當然
耳，幸福往往是短暫的……
故事經過—
Bernie的衰神體質再度發威；當你為了他發揮了小聰明、順利在槍口下捍衛住他的戰利品而
喝采的時候，轉眼間他就果不其然又掉進了別人的陷阱裡，總是如此一波三折，才是Bern的
職涯寫照啊。就算得在三方人馬之間斡旋，Bernie仍能再次憑借他的機智，功德圓滿、功成
身退。
感想—
或許是卜老寫了前兩本之後發現，套路怎麼好像跟Tanner有點重複，一集換一個女人，好像
龐德女郎一樣，所以決定從這本開始，加入一個純友誼的搭檔角色--Carolyn，也從此奠定
Bernie註孤生的命運 lol 從此以後就只能是個搞笑的活寶，再也沒有翻身的機會啦～
至於整個故事的脈絡，總覺得有點像馬爾他之鷹？好幾方人馬為了搶一個目標而互相爭奪，
或許是為了展現Bernie的聰明才智吧，整體而言算是挺本格的古典推理。
有趣的橋段—
故事一開始，是Bernie在顧店，結果遇到小賊在魯班門前弄大斧，非常有趣，內容如下：
小賊手裡拿著一本特價書來櫃台結帳，Bern便開始調戲他—
"The bargain books are forty cents or three for a dollar, which is even more of
a bargain. You just want the one?"
「特價書是一本40分錢，三本一元更划算喔。你只要這本嗎？」
"That's right." He pushed the two quarters an inch or so closer to me. "Just the
one."
「對。」他再度把那兩枚銅板往我面前督了過來。
"Fine," I said. I looked at his face. All I could really see was his brow, and
it looked untroubled, and I would have to do something about that. "Forty cents
for the Cowper, and three cents for the Governor in Albany, mustn't forget him,
and what does that come to?" I leaned over the counter and dazzled him with my
pearly-whites. "I make it thirty-two dollars and seventy cents," I said.
「好吧，」我說。我打量起他的臉。整張臉就只看得見他的眉毛，而那道眉毛看起來毫不心
虛；我得想想辦法才行。「一本考波四十分錢、還要繳三毛錢給住在阿爾巴尼的州長；可別
忘了他的份。這樣加起來是多少？」我身子前傾靠在櫃台上，亮出我一口晶瑩剔透的白牙。
「一共是32塊70分錢。」我說道。 (0.4+0.03=32.7一整個笑炸了我 XDDDDD)
(中文版的翻譯居然不曉得那三毛錢是營業稅，還說什麼買『阿爾巴尼州長』那是什麼鬼？
是把它當一本書了嗎？但是用的引號也不是指書啊，更何況，阿爾巴尼是紐約州首府，又不
是有個州叫做阿爾巴尼...原文那種說法，就類似「重慶南路的xxx總統」。因為稅收是交給
州政府，所以才這樣說，喵的譯者連這都不懂，還當什麼翻譯啊 = =)
"Huh?" 「蛤？」(心裡一定想說：你這心算是怎麼回事？ XD)
"That copy of Byron. Full morocco, marbled endpapers, and I believe it's marked
fifteen dollars. The Wallace Stevens is a first edition and it's a bargain at
twelve. The novel you took was only three dollars or so, and I suppose you just
wanted to read it because you couldn't get anything much reselling it."
「那本拜倫，純摩洛哥皮、大理石紋書封，標價應該是15元。那本華萊士．史蒂文斯是初版
，特價12元。你另外拿的那本小說才三塊左右；這本轉賣沒什麼利潤，所以應該是你自己要
看的吧。」(大理石紋那個，應該是hardcover硬殼裡面那層較厚的紙，用來膠合外層折進去
的羊皮。)
"I don't know what you're talking about."
「我不懂你在說什麼。」
I moved out from behind the counter, positioning myself between him and the door
He did't look as though he intended to sprint but he was wearing running shoes
and you never can tell. Thieves are an unpredictable lot.
我步出櫃台，擋在他跟大門中間。他看起來不像是要逃跑的樣子，不過他腳上可是穿著跑鞋
，而且這種事也說不準；小偷總是不按牌理出牌。
"In the flight bag," I said. "I assume you'll want to pay for what you took."
「包包裡的那些，」我說。「你應該有要結帳吧。」
"This?" He looked down at the flight bag as if astonished to find it dangling
from his fingers. "This is just my gym stuff. You know—sweat socks, a towel,
like that."
「這個？」他驚訝地低頭一看，好似現在才發現自己手上居然提著一個包包。「裡頭就是些
運動用品，像是運動襪、毛巾之類的。」
"Suppose you open it." 「要不你打開來瞧瞧。」
(suppose有提議的語氣，所以不該如譯者那樣翻成強制的命令。)
Perspiration was beading on his forehead but he was trying to tough it out. "You
can't make me," he said. "You've got no authority."
他額頭上已經滲出汗珠，但還在死鴨子嘴硬。「你不能強迫我，」他說。「你沒有資格這麼
做。」 (Tough if out就是裝逼、逞強，什麼「企圖以強硬的方式脫困」？ = =)
"I can call a policeman. He can't make you open it, either, but he can walk you
over to the station house and book you, and *then* he can open it, and do you
really want that to happen? Open the bag."
「我可以叫警察來；他也不能逼你打開，但是他可以把你抓進警局裡調查，到時候他就可以
打開了。你真的想把事情搞成那樣？快把袋子打開。」
He opened the bag. It contained sweat socks, a towel, a pair of lemon-yellow gym
shorts, and the three books I had mentioned along with a nice clean first edi-
tion of Steinbeck's *The Wayward Bus* complete with dust wrapper. It was marked
$17.50, which seemed a teensy bit high.
於是他便把袋子打開。只見裡面裝了運動襪、一條毛巾、一件檸檬黃的運動短褲、我剛才說
的那三本書，還有一本史坦貝克的《不稱心的公車》，是初版的，書況很好，還有一層書衣
，標價十七塊五，似乎貴了點。 (史坦貝克這本書，譯者翻《不羈的巴士》還挺不錯的，只
是沒讀過內容，不知道貼不貼切就是。又，Bernie是嫌那間店標價太貴了，認為那本書沒那
個價值、酸對方黑的意思，譯者翻得有點曖昧。)
題外話：以前讀書時都會託澳門僑生同學帶一些那種
一捆的自裁書衣回來，不然在台灣都不曉得要去哪買，誠品好像有在賣，但是賣很貴 = =
剛剛再查，才知道叫吉利布，不過還是沒有澳門買便宜，當初請同學帶一捆才50，PChome
要賣一兩百 = = 而且款式一樣很少，澳門賣的除了素的霧面之外，還有星星等花紋，材質
也很好很軟，我看網路上分享的好像都比較硬，等收到貨再來比較看看。)
"I didn't get that here," he said. 「那本不是在這裡拿的，」他說。
"You have a bill of sale for it?" 「你有收據嗎？」
"No, but—" 「沒有，可是—」
I scribbled briefly, then gave him another smile. "Let's call it fifty dollars
even," I said, "and let's have it."
我用紙筆草草計算了一下，再度對他露出一個笑容。「就算你五十元整，」我說。「成交吧
。」
"You're charging me for the Steinbeck?" 「那本史坦貝克你也要算我錢？」
"Uh-huh." 「嗯哼。」
"But I had it with me when I came in." 「可是那本是我帶進來的耶。」
"Fifty dollars," I said. 「一共五十元。」我說。
"Look, I don't want to *buy* these books." He rolled his eyes at the ceiling. "
Oh God, why did I have to come in here in the first place? Look, I don't want
any trouble."
「喂，我並不想要買這些書好嗎。」他的白眼都翻到天邊去了。「天哪，我一開始到底幹嘛
要踏進這間店啊？跟你說，我不想要惹麻煩。」(翻白眼而已，譯者卻翻成「看著天花板」
，好像頭都不低下來了一樣 = =")
"Neither do I." 「我也不想。」
"And the last thing I want is to buy anything. Look, keep the books, keep the
Steinbeck too, the hell with it. Just let me get out of here, huh?
「我更不想要買東西。這麼著，書我不要了，管他的，連那本史坦貝克也給你，只要你讓我
離開這裡就好，如何？」 (譯者又在他媽的了......the hell with it明明就沒那麼髒)
"I think you should buy the books." 「我看你還是把書買下來比較好。」
(就是一種很黑道的語氣啊 XDD 聽起來好像很委婉，但其實一整個殺氣騰騰，但是Bernie根
本是個小孬孬不是嗎？好出戲啊 XDDD)
"I don't have the money. I got fifty cents. Look, keep the fifty cents too, okay
? Keep the shorts and the towel, keep the sweat socks, okay? Just let me get the
hell out of here, okay?"
「我身上沒有那麼多錢，只有五十分錢。要不，這五十分錢也給你，可以嗎？短褲、毛巾都
給你，襪子也給你可以嗎？只要讓我離開就好，可以嗎？」
"You don't have any money?" 「你一點錢都沒有？」
"No, nothing. Just the fifty cents. Look—" 「沒有，就只有五十分錢。我說—」
"Let's see your wallet." 「把皮夾拿出來瞧瞧。」
"What are you—I don't have a wallet." 「你想幹什—我沒帶皮夾。」
"Right hip pocket. Take it out and hand it to me."
「屁股右邊口袋。把它拿出來給我。」 (正所謂強盜遇上賊爺爺 XDDD)
"I don't believe this is happening." 「這什麼跟什麼啊……」
I snapped my fingers. "The wallet." 我彈了個響指。「皮夾。」
It was a nice enough black pinseal billfold, complete with the telltale outline
of a rolled condom to recall my own lost adolescence. There was almost a hundred
dollars in the currency compartment. I counted out fifty dollars in fives and
tens, replaced the rest, and returned the wallet to its owner.
那是個很不錯的黑色短夾；從外觀能明顯看出裡面放了一枚未開封的保險套，喚起了我過往
的青春回憶。裡頭的紙鈔有將近一百元；我從中數出了共五十元的小鈔，把剩下的放回去，
再將皮夾物歸原主。(pin seal是指小海豹的皮，要強調材質及價值，不是什麼按扣式的皮
夾 = = 而且保險套也沒有「令人臉紅」好嗎......telltale是在講一眼就看出來裡面有保
險套，都幾歲的人會臉紅？又是男的，有啥好臉紅 = =)
"That's my money," he said. 「那是我的錢耶，」他說。
"You just bought books with it," I told him. "Want a receipt?"
「拿來買書了，」我跟他說。「要開收據嗎？」
"I don't even want the books, dammit." His eyes were watering behind the thick
glasses. "What am I going to do with them, anyway?"
「喵的，我根本連書都不想要好嗎！」在那層厚厚的鏡片底下，他眼眶都泛淚了。
"I suppose reading them is out. What did you plan to do with them originally?"
「看來你是不考慮去讀這些書了。不然你本來打算拿它們怎麼辦？」
譯者是不是又沒看懂out的用法？通常是在想計策、辦法的時候，會盤算好幾條路，out就是
出局，也就是死路、無法進行的意思。在這裡就是說要這個偷書賊摸摸鼻子買回去看是不可
能的了，譯者卻翻成「我想不是應該要讀他們嗎？」 ~"~
He stared at his track shoes. "I was going to sell them."
他頭低低地盯著腳上那雙田徑鞋。「拿去賣掉。」
(為什麼這裡要低頭看鞋？因為這個人做錯事，現在心虛了，所以低頭了。譯者那樣直翻就
沒有帶出因果關係。雖然原文也沒有把低頭的動作寫出來，所以或許也會有人認為這樣就是
過譯了。)
"To whom?" 「賣給誰？」
"I don't know. Some store." 「不曉得，隨便哪間店吧。」
"How much were you going to get for them?" 「那你想賣多少？」
"I don't know. Fifteen, twenty dollars." 「不曉得，十五、二十塊吧。」
"You'd wind up taking ten." 「最後你頂多拿到十塊。」
"I suppose so. 「大概吧。」
"Fine," I said. I peeled off one of his tens and pressed it into his palm. "Sell
them to me."
「那好，」我說，並且把一張十元抽出來塞在他手裡。「賣給我吧。」
"Huh?" 「蛤？」
"Saves running from store to store. I can use good books, they're the very sort
of item I stock, so why not take the ten dollars from me?"
「省得你一間一間跑。這些好書我用得上，我店裡賣的就是這些東西，所以何不從我這
裡賺這十塊錢呢？」 (take the money from me的用法，是在強調：既然都一樣是要賣人，
幹嘛不乾脆賣給我？有種順水推舟的意味在，強調的是賣的「對象」，但原譯者的譯文比較
是在強調「十塊錢」。)
"This is crazy," he said. 「這也太扯了吧，」他說。
"Do you want the books or the money? It's up to you."
「你是要書還是要錢？看你囉。」
"I don't want the books." 「我不想要書……」 搭配淚眼汪汪委屈小媳婦臉 XD)
"Do you want the money?" 「那你想要錢嗎？」
"I guess so." 「應該吧。」 (已經被整到不知道該說什麼好了 XD)
I took the books from him and stacked them on the counter. "Then put it in your
wallet," I said, "before you lose it."
我把他手上的書拿過來，放在櫃台上。「那就快把錢收好，」我說。「免得被你搞丟了。」
原譯文又是火星英式中文。這句為什麼要說"before YOU LOSE it"？因為原本這傢伙好端端
地，卻因為不學好(偷竊的技術 XD)，強盜遇上賊爺爺，無緣無故被噱了40元，正可謂偷雞
不著蝕把米，所以說是他自己搞丟的。
"This is the craziest thing ever. You took fifty bucks from me for books I
didn't want and now you're giving me ten back. I'm out forty dollars, for God's
sake."
「我從來沒遇過這麼離譜的事。你為了那些我壓根不想要的書，向我收了五十塊，現在又
還我十塊。我居然一下子少了四十元！」
"Well, you bought high and sold low. Most people try to work it the other way
around."
「呃，誰叫你買高賣低；大部分的人都是努力反其道而行。」
"*I* should call a cop. I'm the one getting robbed."
「我才該叫警察吧？我才是被搶的那個吧？」
譯者在這裡用「呢」，不會覺得很怪嗎 = =
I packed his gym gear into the Braniff bag, zipped it shut, handed it to him.
Then I extended a forefinger and chucked him under his hairy chin.
我把他的運動用品裝回那個班尼夫包，然後把拉鍊拉起來遞給他，再搔搔他毛茸茸的下巴。
(就說是在調戲他 XD)
"A tip," I said. 「給你個忠告，」我說。
"Huh?" 「蛤？」
"Get out of the business." 「別幹這一行。」
He looked at me. 他直楞楞看著我。
"Find another line of work. Quit lifting things. You're not terribly good at it
and I'm afraid you're temperamentally unsuited to the life that goes with it.
Are you in college?"
「換個工作，別再順手牽羊了，你實在不是很拿手，我看你恐怕也適應不了那樣的生活。你
在念大學嗎？」
"I dropped out." 「輟學了。」
"Why?" 「理由是？」
"It wasn't relevant." 「也沒什麼。」
"Few things are, but why don't you see if you can't get back in? Pick up a
diploma and find some sort of career that suits you. You're not cut out to be a
professional thief."
「世上大部分的事情都沒什麼。你要不要考慮回去念完學位，然後再找個適合自己的工作？
你沒有當職業竊賊的命。」
"A professional—" He rolled his eyes again. "Jesus, I ripped off a couple of
books. Don't make a life's work out of it, huh?"
「職業竊—」他又翻了個白眼。「老天爺，我不過就是摸了幾本書，不代表我要一輩子吃這
行飯吧？」
"Anybody who steals things for resale is a professional criminal," I told him.
"You just weren't doing it in a very professional manner, that's all. But I'm
serious about this. Get out of the business." I laid a hand lightly on his wrist
"Don't take this the wrong way," I said, "but the thing is you're too dumb to
steal."
「只要把偷到手的東西轉手賣掉，就叫做職業罪犯，」我告訴他。「只不過你的手法不夠專
業罷了。不過我說真的：快別幹這一行。」我輕輕地按著他的手腕。「別誤會我的意思，」
我說。「不過實情就是—要想做賊，你還嫌太笨了。」
完全就是：想當賊，你還未夠班啊～～～
p.33 Carolyn首次登場（奇怪，為啥突然之間就出現了這號人物？我前前後後研究了好幾次
，想說是不是我漏看了，但是就真的是這樣突然空降到了Bernie的生活之中啊。）
卜老形容她"she's built like a fire hydrant, which is dangerous in her line of
work." 是說她長得像個消防栓，身為一個寵物美容師，這可是很危險的，因為，想也知道
小狗最愛尿在消防栓上 lol 因此只要說長得像消防栓就好，原譯文畫蛇添足補上一句「這
樣的五短身材幹她那行可是很危險的。」反而讓人不解其意。
p.141 又在酸醫生的筆跡
Carolyn: "You got some handwriting. You should have been a doctor, did anyone
ever tell you that?"
記得之前也在哪裡看過，反正醫生開處方的時候，就是非得要像鬼畫符不可 lol
譯文問題—
C5, p.86 「讓我們理性點。」 原文：Let us be reasonable."
這裡是在講有人找上門，向Bernie要他偷的那本書，而這句話的笑點在：明明是這人手裡
拿著槍，指著Bernie，但這句話卻是從他嘴裡說出來 lol 一般來說，都是被人用槍指著的
那個，才會說出「有話好好說」這句話，這人卻是反其道而行。就算不這樣翻，也可以說
「大家講點道理嘛～」，就如同p.88翻的那樣，不是很好嗎？翻什麼理性，理性跟可以理
喻是有所差異的，畢竟理性的反義詞是感性，難道不可理喻就等於感性了？
p.136 「拍紙簿」 好吧，其實這譯文沒有問題，但我要追究的是當初發明這個譯文的人…
…他娘的請他給我好好解釋解釋，什麼叫做驚喜，不對，是什麼叫做拍紙簿？？？ 原文是
："note pad"，因此拍這個字很顯然是從pad音譯過來的，但什麼叫拍？你是在拍什麼？
這壓根沒有翻譯到啊！誰曉得這是什麼鬼？當然，由於這種筆記本是專指可以一頁一頁撕下
來的一本便條紙，為了區分所以給他一個獨特的譯名，這很合理，但從中文的邏輯去推敲，
卻根本無法將這個詞與這個物件連結起來啊……雖然很多老一輩的翻譯的外來語本就有不少
類似這樣的問題，但我真心覺得這裡翻筆記本就可以了……要說我孤陋寡聞也是可以啦……
p.144 「怎麼樣，那女人吃醋囉。」 原文:"How about that?" she said. "The bitch is
jealous." 原譯文是也沒什麼問題，不過何必把bitch馬賽克？Carolyn本來就不是多文雅的
淑女，她用這種字眼稱呼她的女伴，毫不意外啊，幹嘛不直接翻「意外吧，這婊子居然吃醋
了。」 （How about that 也是很多人無法理解的慣用語，其實就意同「逆砍砍、逆砍砍」
、「想不到吧/沒料到吧/意外吧？」，說這句話的時候意外成份是很高的，通常是驚喜。）
p.279 「從我所站的地方看來」 原文: from where I stood 也是常見的慣用語，意思就是
「在我看來」，這裡的 where I stand 是指抽象的「立場」。
這本中譯本我只大略翻了翻，沒有仔細對照，但譯文貌似沒什麼問題，真是謝天謝地 Orz
※ 編輯: Raist (36.226.201.61), 07/29/2017 01:41:08
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好久好久沒上來，直到現在才看到推文，請見諒啊 ^^"
感謝S大有心，竟然特地去查了語源，受教了～
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唉唉，感謝各位願意看我時常充滿怨氣的長文，
然而當時因看了過多令人髮指的錯誤譯文，導致我有點消化不良，
是以這系列文竟然中斷了這麼久（幾年有了 >"<）
最近我再看看是否會繼續這串系列文 但是人老了實在提不起勁（？）
※ 編輯: Raist (36.227.190.144 臺灣), 11/15/2019 00:34:28