20160711
Dear Diary
Hello, me , again.
It's been a very long time, since I last time wrote in english.
Today, I am gonna comfess something which I figure out just few days ago.
It seems that my personality is rooted too deep inside my thought.
It is too hard to change it even though with my self control ability.
My failure told me an ugly truth that I wasnt ready for those which I
thought I am ready for it. At the moment I aware of this, I feel nothing
but sadness and frustration. 9 years ago, I made a huge mistake.
After that, I try to self-control myself. By making a lot of principle, rule
to myself, and I am too naive to believe these might work.
3 years ago, I still let fear and anger take my will, and the another terrible
things happens. Negative emotional reaction still get control of me when
it reaches my break point. I do not know how or what to do now.
It is time to take a break and pull myself out of there for a while.
I am sorry for those involved friends. But I can't do anything right now.
Let the time heal, it is the only thing I can do now.
It seems that my english writing is still awful. :(
Wish them good luck and still have fun without me.
I hope this wont take too long, before I find a way to overcome it.
But it seems to be not easy, probably will stuck here for a long time.
Anyway, I still need to move on. After all, tomorrow is another day.
Bye, Diary, I will back soon.
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