按鍵之後,重新開始
最近腦中一直反覆出現這樣的句子。
走路的時候,坐在捷運上的時候,
總會突然掉進這樣的思緒中:
我會不會越活越偏離原本描繪的生活圖像,
卻一點也不知道?
獨自生活在沒有家人的城市
變得越來越堅強;
即使疼痛,也還有力氣推開伸過來要攙扶自己的手;
隔著一層很薄的膜關心朋友;
自問對一切似乎都盡心也盡責了,
然後呢?
最近那個埋在心底深處的願望又浮上引誘著自己:
離開現在的自己,到很遠的地方去,
沒有人認識自己的地方,
天氣晴朗夜晚有涼風吹拂的地方,
只要想就可以隨時看到海或山的地方,
用勞力換取可應付生活的酬勞,
跟很多很多的人交換目光,
但這些人都是自己以前不曾認識過的。
每次讀小說、看電影,
任何一個逃離原本生活的角色都可輕易贏得我的認同,
就像beatles那首歌:
Wednesday morning at five o'clock as the day begins
Silently closing her bedroom door
Leaving the note that she hoped would say more
She goes downstairs to the kitchen clutching her hankerchief
Quietly turning the backdoor key
Stepping ourside she is free.
我不太知道自己想逃離的究竟是什麼,
可能是總覺得自己在某個時候已經選擇錯誤的方向
而我有沒有可能訂正它呢?
真是奇怪,雖然春天到了,
一切看來如此美好,
我的腦袋裡卻開始轉動著這些並不快樂的念頭......
--
※ 發信站: 批踢踢實業坊(ptt.cc)
◆ From: 61.222.60.117
推
03/11 13:15, , 1F
03/11 13:15, 1F
→
03/11 13:18, , 2F
03/11 13:18, 2F
→
03/11 13:24, , 3F
03/11 13:24, 3F
→
03/11 14:08, , 4F
03/11 14:08, 4F
→
03/11 14:16, , 5F
03/11 14:16, 5F
→
03/11 14:30, , 6F
03/11 14:30, 6F
→
03/11 14:36, , 7F
03/11 14:36, 7F
→
03/11 14:38, , 8F
03/11 14:38, 8F
→
03/11 14:38, , 9F
03/11 14:38, 9F
→
03/11 14:40, , 10F
03/11 14:40, 10F
推
03/11 14:41, , 11F
03/11 14:41, 11F
→
03/11 14:41, , 12F
03/11 14:41, 12F
→
03/11 14:42, , 13F
03/11 14:42, 13F
→
03/11 14:43, , 14F
03/11 14:43, 14F
→
03/11 14:44, , 15F
03/11 14:44, 15F
→
03/11 14:44, , 16F
03/11 14:44, 16F
→
03/11 14:45, , 17F
03/11 14:45, 17F
→
03/11 14:46, , 18F
03/11 14:46, 18F
→
03/11 14:46, , 19F
03/11 14:46, 19F
→
03/11 14:47, , 20F
03/11 14:47, 20F
→
03/11 14:50, , 21F
03/11 14:50, 21F
→
03/11 14:53, , 22F
03/11 14:53, 22F
→
03/11 14:54, , 23F
03/11 14:54, 23F
→
03/11 14:54, , 24F
03/11 14:54, 24F
→
03/11 14:55, , 25F
03/11 14:55, 25F
→
03/11 14:56, , 26F
03/11 14:56, 26F
推
03/11 14:56, , 27F
03/11 14:56, 27F
→
03/11 14:57, , 28F
03/11 14:57, 28F
→
03/11 14:58, , 29F
03/11 14:58, 29F
推
03/11 14:59, , 30F
03/11 14:59, 30F
→
03/11 14:59, , 31F
03/11 14:59, 31F
→
03/11 15:01, , 32F
03/11 15:01, 32F
→
03/11 15:01, , 33F
03/11 15:01, 33F
→
03/11 15:03, , 34F
03/11 15:03, 34F
→
03/11 15:04, , 35F
03/11 15:04, 35F
→
03/11 15:11, , 36F
03/11 15:11, 36F
推
03/11 21:04, , 37F
03/11 21:04, 37F
推
03/11 21:45, , 38F
03/11 21:45, 38F
→
03/11 21:47, , 39F
03/11 21:47, 39F
→
03/11 21:49, , 40F
03/11 21:49, 40F
推
03/12 02:25, , 41F
03/12 02:25, 41F
推
03/12 08:14, , 42F
03/12 08:14, 42F
→
03/12 08:33, , 43F
03/12 08:33, 43F
→
03/12 11:47, , 44F
03/12 11:47, 44F
→
08/24 02:08, , 45F
08/24 02:08, 45F