[分享] 托福<作文高分>的秘密
分享：托福作文高分的秘密
大家好，我是字神的助教：
有時同學托福寫作，覺得寫的不錯，卻沒得到理想分數，
或自認寫的掏心掏肺又對題目刻骨銘心的深切，官方卻回饋寫作偏題。
其實托福寫作有超多眉角的，如果沒有都一一認清，常常事倍功半，
今天就和同學分享第一個托福作文高分的秘密。
托福作文有多個選擇時，只寫一個選擇好好發展，就能得高分??
2014年後半年到2015年中，相信有很多同學會覺得TOEFL作文題目的選項，由大部分的標
準二選一題目到多重選項，如三選一或是四選一
例如:
二選一題目：(Educate students VS. Do a research).
The main role of a university professor is to educate students rather than to
do research.
--
三選一題目 ：Which is the best way for students to make friends:
(a) participating in sports team,
(b) volunteering for community service, or
(c) traveling?
有考生可能會覺得，管它幾個選項，反正我只挑出我的選擇就好了。
但考生不要忘了，在題目給的選項中，你不僅僅要對你選的選項提出佐證和支持，也就是
說，在你提到為何你從這三個或四個選項中選擇了你比較偏愛那一個選項的同時，你也要
對於其它選項為何不選擇的思維有所著墨。題目才不致於偏頗。
根據An Insider’s Guide to TOEFL iBT
一個滿分的文章，就是要完全清楚的詮釋主題和題目問你的問題
(It clearly addresses the topic and the task.)。
或者是
官方指南中的：”有效地”詮釋題目主題 和 題目問你的問題
(effectively addresses the topic and task)。
換句話說，如果考生只是一昧的集中思緒於所選的選項，那麼這個題目是沒有完全被清楚
的闡述出來(some points may not be fully elaborated)。讀者也無法從你寫的文章內
容反推回完整題目。
--
例如：以一題TOEFL高頻題目來論
同意與否: 大部分人(有困難時)不尋求政府的幫忙，因為他們覺得靠自己或是靠家人是比
較好的
Agree or disagree: Most people do not count on government for help because
they think that it is always better to either do things on their own or to
ask for help from their family.
如果考生選擇的是不同意題目，而是覺得當人們有困難時，是會比較依賴政府的幫忙。於
是就寫了幾段支持自己立場，說政府如何好，是可以依靠政府幫忙的。然而如果沒有提到
為什麼他們不同意依靠家人或自己永遠是較好的選項，那麼，這個主題的詮釋是偏頗的。
讀者有可能看完文章後以為題目是→同意與否: 大部分人(有困難時)會不會尋求政府的幫
忙(Agree or disagree: Most people count on government for help when they are
in difficulty.) 同學可以在以上反灰的中文題目中，看到不同。所以，無論如何，要把
題目字適時的丟出，以繞題。(一個好絕招避免偏頗解題就是，在寫作文時要常常回去讀
題目:因為我們讀完題目後，寫到最後，記憶中可能只記得幾個關鍵字，但可能有些條件
或是狀況已忘記而未回答。)
同理可證，如果題目選項越多，題目難度越困難，而且是不可以只回答自己所選的那一個
選項，同時，也是要談一下在題目條件中，相對下，你為什麼是選A而非B或C或甚至D。
--
例如:
下列哪個因素對你選擇住哪最重要?
Which of the following is most important factor to you when you are making
decisions on choosing a place for living?
(1) living in a place that is not expensive
(2) living close to relatives
(3) living in an area with many shops and restaurants
例如你選了(2) living close to relatives.你不可以只說為何以居住來說，
”住在親戚附近”是你覺得最重要的選擇，你還要至少找一個段落談一下
為何其它兩個選項對你來說，相對不重要，或有更大的缺點。這些你不選的選項篇幅
不用多，它們也許是配角，是拿來比較一下而已，但是你會讓讀者有機會看到題目的
全貌及詳細的題目主題。以一個段落來說明:我覺得以居住來說，住在離親戚近一點是
比較好的。
To begin with, people can receive instant assistance by strengthening family
bonds in a more promised way.(主題句) In this modern society, relatives are
all spreading around in different areas. They know each other, yet they do
not have time to be with each other. However, relatives are those people who
have family bonds with us. Through relatives living close by, people can gain
more chances to talk to each other and meet each other in this hectic world.(
清楚解釋這個主題和題目有何關係:這個位置當字數過多時是可精簡或省略的) For
example, if I want some suggestions on my new job or on my work, I can
quickly seek assistances by meeting them because they are living close by.
Since we are all from the same family and maybe have grown up together when
we were young, I can trust them better by meeting each other in person. I can
feel cared more and can settle my own problems in a more efficient way.(清楚的
論點 + 緊咬題目) This is why I choose this option instead of the cost of the
living place or the living area where I can easily go to a shop or a
restaurant. Those options focus on the exterior part more, rather than the
inner part in which I think a living place must possess—relatives living
nearby.(談到題目其它選項迳通常談論其缺點是較容易寫的)
有些同學也許會說，是不是每一段都是要提到其它你沒選的選項? 答案→不是的。我們可
以僅僅只對比一個你沒選的選項即可。這種內容上拿出來做比較，其寫作的概念就是--自
己的選項有多好，而你沒選的選項在同樣情形有多差--(抓一個出來比較好)，以同一題，
同一個中間段來說，我們是可以只提出一個選項來對比:
例如:
To begin with, people can receive instant assistance by strengthening family
bonds in a more promised way.(主題句) In this modern society, relatives are
all spreading around in different areas. They know each other, yet they do
not have time to be with each other. However, relatives are those people who
have family bonds with us. Through relatives living close by, people can gain
more chances to talk to each other and meet each other in this hectic world.(
清楚解釋這個主題和題目有何關係:這個位置當字數過多時是可精簡或省略的) For
example, if I want some suggestions on my new job or on my work, I can
quickly seek assistances by meeting them because they are living close by.
Since we are all from the same family and maybe have grown up together when
we were young, I can trust them better by meeting each other in person. I can
feel cared more and can settle my own problems in a more efficient way.(清楚的
論點 + 緊咬題目) This is why I choose this option instead of, for example,
the cost of the living place. I can save money for sure, yet I cannot build
up great family bonds with relatives and I might not be able to receive
instant help from them if I live far away.(反灰之前和上一段都一樣，反灰之後，
是只對比一個沒選的項目)
最後，根據筆者的觀察，現在的TOEFL寫作題目越來越不單純，有點像IELTS(雅思)考題。
也就是說，要看清楚題目到底問你什麼，你再根據題目問題回答。我們來看看下面這題:
If you're going to make a big purchase (such as, a car or a house...),
explain how the following three sources of information influence your
decision.
1. Recommendations from friends or colleagues.
2. Recommendations from the media (for example, newspaper, TV,...)
3. Recommendations from a salesperson in a store.
小心看好題目喔! 這一題是叫你寫每一個選項的影響力，並沒有叫你選一種或哪一個選項
比較好喔! (這和傳統TOEFL考題比較不一樣)，也就是說，考生要根據這三個選項一一寫
出它們的對於你影響力。還有剛剛有談到，寫時要一直一直回去看題目，在題目裡有一個
重要條件迳 big purchase.(高金額的購物) 所以你的內容要以這個重要條件為中心，否
則就偏題了!! 筆者提供兩段範例，同學可以比較一下寫法: (迳有故意寫多，是”閱讀”
版 非“寫作”版)
Firstly, recommendations from friends or colleagues win my trust. As we all
know that friends or colleagues are those people we socialize with, so we
will place more trust on them. Since the big purchase(主題在前半段一定要帶出來
)should find trust source in order to make the final decision in an objective
way. Besides, for instance, when friends or colleagues recommend me for
something, it usually means they have the experience using the same products
and are able to provide their sincere opinions for more considerations for my
purchase. For instance, when i was trying to buy a car, my friend suggested
me to locate my need first. I had no idea about it because I just wanted the
feeling of owning a car like everybody did. After talking to him, he
suggested me to buy a Toyota, which was not that expensive, yet durable. If I
decided to sell it, it would not be too difficult since people love this type
of car. Trusting my friend, I bought the car and I made a right choice. Thus,
recommendations from either friends or colleagues are more trustworthy and
people believe them more.
Secondly, recommendations from the media enable people to create the
opportunity of demand. Information sources from, for example, newspaper or TV
actually all make attempts to catch people’s eye in a short time trying to
create the need for viewers. To clarify, for big purchases, if I do not have
the need, I would not pay much attention to it. If the newspaper or TV tries
to make people know they are selling houses, they either write down or say
all the benefits and advantages in the shortest form possible, maybe with an
exaggerating way. Buyers will be attracted at that moment due to the flashy
punch lines or embellished facts about them and think about buying the item
whether they really need it or not. Another example is TV Shopping channels.
The host acts as a friend of us or an inspector of the product for us in
selling things. Sometimes we just do not need such big purchase, such as
fancy cars or jewelries, but due to the benefits being overstated, we try to
persuade ourselves to buy them. For example, maybe the big ticket items can
increase the value over time or it is a must for a modern person to own such
fancy vehicles. The demand will be created from this information source.
同學從上面的範文，可以感受cohesion 和 centering on the topic的感覺，這也是
TOEFL高分的象徵。以TOEFL Official Guide 滿分的評語作為筆者對各位辛苦的考生們一
個最大的祝福，下次見:
An essay at this level largely accomplishes all of the following:
- effectively addresses the topic and task
- is well organized and well developed, using clearly appropriate
explanations, exemplifications, and/or details
- displays unity, progression, and coherence
其它重要且未考出的3個選項題目: 加油喔~~
1.Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Parents cannot control their children because their children are easily in
V, the radio and people outside their homes.
2.In times of economic crisis, local governments often reduce the money they
spend in some areas. In your opinion, if a government is facing economic
problems, which of the following area should it spend less money on:
libraries, public, transportation, or the police?
3.Which of the following do you think contributes the most to an enjoyable
vacation: good food, good location, or good friends to travel with?
4.When thinking of major purchasing, which one will most influence your
decision?
--Recommendations from our friends or colleagues
--Information from media (TV, newspaper, magazines)
--Salesmen in the market
--Decide all by yourself without other information
TOEFL學習團 托福JJ情報資源、問題探討、考試情報交流
http://goo.gl/MEQV46
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※ 文章網址: https://www.ptt.cc/bbs/TOEFL_iBT/M.1432123117.A.228.html
※ 編輯: liamasso (220.135.2.166), 05/20/2015 20:06:37
※ 編輯: liamasso (220.135.2.166), 05/20/2015 21:49:04
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※ 編輯: liamasso (220.135.2.166), 05/21/2015 13:54:51