[請假]我想我遲了一步，抱歉。
關於星期六練球的事。
雖然星期三曾和一位學長提起我無法到達的事，但這總得向教練請益。
看了請假時間慌了一下，但有些事實在無法避免出差錯。
那麼我還是得說，這個星期六我無法到，因為中友會的迎新。
抱歉晚了些......。
==============================Parting Line=====================================
About my weaknesses
As I said a couple of days before, I seldom (nearly never) play
basketball, and those weaknesses (I reflect on them once again) I
have all my life are extremely troublesome to not only the whole Team
but me myself.
Wednesday's first pratice embarrassed me A LOT. I actually had
wondered if I should join without serious consideration (since I longed
to learn how to play basketball, I'd instantly decided whatsoever). When
Shauan suddenly told me about the practice, I was too shocked to response.
This was the moment that I would avoid to decrease my own humiliation.
For a boy like me who knows nothing about basketball as well as the rules,
the skills and the whole game, I hesitated again and again, thinking of
annoying results brought about by my ignorance.
Though some of you upperclassmates may say just enjoy playing
basketball and have fun -- like the coach said: "Bring as many of your
classmates to the Team as possible, whether capable of it or not, this
is for body health and for interests." -- I still can't but assume that
it's good skills that matter when it comes to the possibilities of
winning any games (within or between colleges). For that specific reason,
weaklings might undergo strict supervisions and horrible training; but
what I fear in the very first place is BEING DESPISED by teammates. (I
honestly have no qualification to become a part of the team.)
That might sound ridiculous to many of you; seriously, however, it
means a lot to me. I myself regard how others think of me as an index of
my self-evaluation. Hence, I tend to look down on myself when people feel
I am inferior. And it will go on for a long time and the healing will
take as long.
I still feel ashamed right this moment. My friends were surprised
at my decision to join the basketball team for DFLL, and they showed a
"You've got to be kidding me!!" expression, which hurt me immediately but,
at the same time, struck me with the cruel truth too. In the past, I would
be the last person they think of as a basketball player. Now, I dare not
proclaim that I can be a skilled player later on. I don't even know if I
can perform well in every basic actions. Hopefully, I dare imagine that
some day in the future I can play basketball freely with every boy, and,
most importantly, enjoy myself without uncomfotable consciousness --
despite the rough skills.
I have a dream that is almost past reality. I want to realize it.
With due respect.
--
＊因為年少，所以持著青春的筆，寫下青春事記。
--
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※ 編輯: SetsunaLeo 來自: 140.112.7.59 (09/23 23:50)
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