ESPN上的酸文
在ESPN上看到一篇在講昨天 Kentucky 和 Cornell 比賽的文章
大概算是我看過所有酸運動比賽文章裡最酸的(明明網酸中職的不算)
跟兩年前一篇酸 NFL底特律獅子隊的文章有拼
兩間學校都被酸的亂七八糟
不過還蠻好笑的
原文在這
http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/news/story?id=5030817
下面節錄一些比較好笑的部份(其實幾乎是從頭酸到尾)
"Kentucky started two McDonald's High School All-Americans.
Cornell players hardly even eat at McDonald's."
"Kentucky specializes in the one-and-done.
Cornell does nothing but four-and-done. If not five."
"One of Cornell's players, Eitan Chemerinski,
did a Rubik's cube in less than three minutes
earlier this year. He's the one who speaks five languages.
"He's learning Mandarin now, for fun," said a Cornell spokesman.
But as 6-foot-11, 275-pound UK freshman center
DeMarcus Cousins said before the game, "This ain't a spelling bee.""
"Seems like every time Wroblewski tried to throw a lob pass
into his 7-foot one-time walk-on center, Jeff Foote,
Kentucky's fab freshman John Wall would leap up and snatch it out of the air.
"Yeah, in the Ivy league, I can usually get those in there,"
he lamented. If it makes you feel any better,
Chris, Wall might be the No. 1 pick in the NBA draft this summer.
"I know," he said. "I'm a fan of his."
"Here were Cornell's starting majors: three in applied economics,
one in policy analysis and one in biology.
Here were Kentucky's: Well, we don't know Kentucky's.
They don't list them anywhere in their media guide. And it's 208 page
"Even Kentucky's cheerleaders were ridiculously better.
Six guys, six gals and every one of them could do a standing backflip.
They all looked like they went to Bicep Camp.
Cornell had 11 gal cheerleaders and one guy, Jeffrey Holland.
"Why am I the only one?" he said when I asked him.
"I don't know. I've always been the only one.
Junior high school. High school. And now college.
I'm always the only one. Imagine that.
The best they could do was a shaky three-man pyramid.
Kentucky's did one that practically reached the top of the Carrier Dome.
Then flipped off it. Of course that's not really fair.
Many of them will probably go pro, too."
"The Big Red's offense went Big Dead...."
"Cornell's players shouldn't mourn, though.
Most will leave their basketball careers behind now
and go on to fabulous careers in science, business and medicine.
And the good news: Many of them will meet these same Kentucky players
again in NBA arenas across America very soon.
They'll be able to afford season tickets."
--
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