[心得] 反推五神傳說首部曲的中譯本（章澤儀譯）

看板Fantasy作者tinyrain ( )時間1年前 (2022/07/27 02:43)推噓8(8推 0噓 31→)

留言39則, 7人參與討論串1/1

注意：本篇說的是奇幻基地出版的章澤儀譯本前陣子趁著某電子書平台折扣想買些新書來看，在網路上爬到這套的前兩部風評似乎不錯尤其爬文看到一些網友都表示翻譯品質良好，我就買下去了。昨天終於開始看，沒多久就覺得譯文讀起來很痛苦。我的感想講起來會很難聽就不多說了，總之是我個人對故事很好奇，但被譯文弄到看不下去的程度。因為這跟之前看到的評價差距太大，我開始懷疑莫非是原文就很歪七扭八？剛才找原文試閱來對了一下，天啊，措辭語氣大家口味不同就不多評論了，超基本的低級錯誤一堆，我完全傻眼。真的只隨便抓了幾個地方就每對每出事。= = 版上好像有些人很推這翻譯，我也沒興趣吵架，但至少我自己對過後覺得非常賭爛，完全看不下去也不想再看下去。我買這兩本書的錢確定是浪費掉了，但不希望有其他像我這樣的受害者。放上我抓來對的三個段落，有興趣的人可以看一下對照，自己衡量一下是否能接受。沒力氣再像當年刺客後傳跟活船那樣做對比跟吐槽，直接貼第一章幾個相鄰段落的原文對比。＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝ The captain pointed down the road to where another track crossed it. "Is that the road to Valenda?" It had been... Cazaril had to stop and count it in his head, and the sum dismayed him. Seventeen years since he had ridden last down this road, going off not to ceremony but to real war in the provincar of Baocia's train. Although bitter to be riding a gelding and not a finer warhorse, he'd been just as glossy-haired and young and arrogant and vain of his dress as the fine young animals up there staring down at him. Today, I should be happy for a donkey, though I had to bend my knees to keep from trailing my toes in the mud. Cazaril smiled back up at the soldier-brothers, fully aware of what hollowed-out purses lay gaping and disemboweled behind most of those rich facades. 隊長指著不遠處的一條岔路，問道：「那條路是不是通往瓦倫達（Valenda）？」以前是的……但卡札里沒讓自己說出口，也不讓自己再想下去──十七年前，他最後一次騎馬走上這條坡徑，青春正盛而意氣風發，不可一世得就像眼前這群人，因為他是全副武裝、隨貝歐夏領主（Provincar）的大軍趕赴沙場；縱使當時騎的只是一匹閹馬而非上好的戰馬，也強過這一幫中看不中用的典禮花瓶。可是今天我寧願沉潛，甚至卑躬屈膝以求遠避禍端，能有一頭驢子騎都該謝天謝地了。卡札里朝這些奉侍兵微笑，深知他們正是金玉其外、敗絮其內。 ==== They stared down their noses at him as though they could smell him from there. He was not a person they wished to impress, no lord or lady who might hand down largesse to them as they might to him; still, he would do for them to practice their aristocratic airs upon. They mistook his returning stare for admiration, perhaps, or maybe just for half-wittedness. 這幫人的神情倨傲、姿態居高臨下，標準的狗眼看人低。他們沒打算討好卡札里，討好了也不會拿到賞賜，倒是卡札里願意賞他們一堂課，教他們長長貴族氣息。 ===== If the young soldier-brother had had more wits about him, he might well have unraveled this mockery, and Cazaril the seeming-peasant drawn a well-earned horsewhip across his face. Little enough chance of that, judging by the brother's bull-like stare, though the captain's lips twisted in exasperation. But the captain just shook his head and gestured his column onward. If the banner-bearer was too proud to scramble in the mud, Cazaril was much too tired to. 要是這位年輕的奉侍兵多一點機智，就能聽出這番話裡的諷刺和羞辱，或者看出面前的鄉巴佬並非尋常人。無奈這掌旗兵就只是個四肢發達的傢伙，反倒那位隊長聽出了話頭，不高興地撇一撇嘴角，卻也僅是搖搖頭，舉手示意隊伍繼續前進。卡札里實在是懶得去撿那個錢。太懶，或者太累了。＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝以上截的第一二段是原本就接在一起的，第二段跟第三段之間只隔了三個小段落，然後低級錯誤就這麼多...... 各種語氣的扭曲跟化學添加物(?)請有興趣的人自己看，只吐最簡單又嚴重的第一段的"It had been... " 很明顯地是接後面回想到底過了多久的那句"Seventeen years since he had..." 這麼基礎的文法怎麼能錯成這樣？ " had to stop and count it in his head "也跟著被亂翻一通第二段" still, he would do for them to practice their aristocratic airs upon " 明明就是指那群傲慢士兵看主角（Cazaril／卡札里）外表落魄，就想對他逞威風，結果被翻成根本八竿子打不著的「卡札里願意賞他們一堂課，教他們長長貴族氣息」？！誰來賞該為這譯文成品負責的人一堂課好嗎？！然後第二段原文最後那句不知道是不是會跟那個荒謬錯譯搭不上，譯文就直接跳過沒翻了（不是我沒貼，是譯文就沒那句，直接開始下一段）第三段譯文擅自跳略，又另外自己亂加原文沒有的東西。我確認過原文，那段後面我沒引的部分也確定完全沒有任何句子有主角懶得去撿的涵義。因為一些個人因素，目前看原文試閱其實不太方便，所以真的只是隨便抽這幾段對而已，然後就這樣。二部曲是同家出版社同個譯者，我已經直接放棄了。自己沒看過所以標題只寫反推首部曲，但如果有想買二部曲的人，建議也先對一下試閱，確定品質自己可以接受再下手。QQ -- ※ 發信站: 批踢踢實業坊(ptt.cc), 來自: 1.175.222.16 (臺灣) ※ 文章網址: https://www.ptt.cc/bbs/Fantasy/M.1658861037.A.14C.html

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這譯者還翻過山德森的破戰者板上也有對破戰者某些翻譯用心和這位譯者譯文的品質正面評價其實買書前我自己爬譯者資料時，除了一個以亂攻擊人聞名的問題人物之外我查到對這位譯者或本書中譯本的評價都是正面的所以覺得不PO出來平衡報導一下實在有違自己的良心 ※ 編輯: tinyrain (1.173.248.102 臺灣), 07/27/2022 11:19:49

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